Learning Lessons

It feels like I am accelerating at an incredible pace and learning new things about myself and my world everyday.  But through all of the new lessons one theme keeps popping out.  I can't do everything on my own and I have trying for too long to run my own race.  I am horrible about asking for help.  I would rather sit back and figure out how do something on my own, even if it takes longer,  than to ask for help.  Or if it seems like something is impossible then I don't try.

Well, that way of doing things got me to a unhealthy place in a number of ways and I finally came to a realization that how I was eating had become a destructive behavior.  I needed help.  I knew from  the past that I could not do it on my own.  I needed to ask for help

I had to do something, so I wrote a Facebook message to a high school friend asking for help. I had been watching her journey over the last year or so and was inspired by what she had accomplished.  Inspired or not it was still a difficult message to write. I wrote and rewrote and deleted the message countless times.  Who knew hitting send could be so hard?  Each time I would hover over the send button I would get this wave of anxiety and hit cancel instead.   Did I mention that I have a hard time asking for help?  Finally I just did it.  I hovered over the send, closed my eyes, and click the button.  One click changed my life.  Yes, the support and awesomeness that came in reply was phenomenal, but the act of hitting send, the act of asking for help, that is what changed my life.

So, what is holding you back?  Where in your life do you need to hit the send button? We are all in this life together, so let's live it together!

What is with all this health stuff?

If you have been reading any of my posts on Facebook, you may have noticed a marked change in the last week.  More than one person has asked what is going on?  Why am I working out all of sudden?  And what is with all this health stuff?  

Well let me tell you what it is all about and why I am doing this now.  I am obese according to the BMI. I am unhealthy, my blood pressure is on the edge of high and at my last doctor's visit it was suggested that I go on cholesterol lowering medication because I had just tipped the scale to above the acceptable borderline level.  (Not that borderline is a great place to be either).  I am 34 years old.  I am too young for pills and disease to take a hold of me.   My weight is killing me and I am not OK with that!

So decided to make a change.  I decided to choose health over disease. And to take control of my life.  It was not an easy week. In fact it was incredibly stressful week, but I remained steady and true to myself.  There were a couple of times I felt defeated and ready to grab the nearest candy bowl.  But I didn't and that feels amazing and incredibly empowering. 

I love the path I am on. I love where it is taking me and I ready for the adventures along the way. I know I will stumble and I know I may fall.  But I refuse to stay down!  I will get back up, brush myself off and keep on movin'. 

Once upon a time...

I started this blog so I could write about my life.  Well, you may have noticed I haven't really written anything for the last...oh...forever. I am not a structure person, I love going with the flow and taking things as they come.  This is both good and bad.  On the positive side I don't get too bent out of shape when plans change, or need to be rearranged.  Now if I had been planning something for months and it fell apart, that is a completely different story.  My go with the flow nature also leads me down a path of no doing.  Hence the long hiatus from my first post.  Anyone want to take bets on how long it will take for me to post the third post? Don't quote me on this but I am going to try and post at least once a week.  It may not be much, but I gotta start somewhere.

Gotta Start Somewhere

Several years ago my mom told me I needed to write a book.  Over the years I have thought about it quite a bit.  I can look back through journals and find bits and pieces, starts and stops, but never anything that came together as any sort of narrative. Most of my writings were/are random bits of life, rants, and wonderings.  Whenever I actually thought about writing a book I would get stuck on, "Why should I tell my story? We all have unique and important stories to share with the world. What makes mine so important?"  It has been a long road and winding road but I can now say that my story is important, I need to tell it, and it needs to be heard. 

So I am here to tell my story, to talk about life as I see it, and to let my voice be heard.  So I invite you into my world and into my life.